How do you define success? The dictionary defines it as:

• Success - the accomplishment of an aim or purpose.

• Success - a person or thing that achieves desired aims or attains prosperity.

• Success - the attainment of popularity or profit.

As I searched these definitions, the second one caught my eye - “the attainment of popularity or profit”. Yes! I thought. This is what we are taught to believe what success is in sports. And THIS is the problem that many athletes struggle with. Of all three definitions, this is the one that has the caveat of basing success on others opinions, instead of the successor themselves. This is the definition that, rather than being a fact, it is an opinion of you based on other’s beliefs.  

Swimming was the first sport I fell in love with. Beginning at the age of six, every summer I was in the pool by 8am for swim practice and traveled on the weekends to small towns in Kansas and Nebraska for swim meets. Those weekends started at 7am and lasted until the late afternoon. Needless to say, they were extremely long days. We would camp outside of the pool area all day, play games and run around with our friends between swim races. Only about fifteen minutes until you heard your race being announced for check-in would you go to get warmed up and ready to go. There were nerves during these weekend meets, no doubt (especially leading up to the dreadful Individual Medley race) however, I always enjoyed these long days because I loved what I was doing. I loved swimming and the thrill of competing in the pool. What I remember most about those summer mornings and weekends was the fun that I had and the relationships that I built while swimming. It wasn’t until I got a little older, around the age of 11 or 12, that I started doubting myself and feeling this perceived pressure to win every race. Why? Because all I focused on was making my teammates, parents and coaches proud instead of myself.  Eventually, my success was based on the attainment of popularity from others and profit of winning all of those blue ribbons.

Another spring and summertime sport for me growing up was track and field. I can still smell the tar from a hot summer’s day out on the track, and it makes me sick to my stomach. I hated track, but every year I continued to run until I graduated high school. I told others (and convinced myself) that I ran track to stay competitive and stay in shape for my other sports - which looking back now, was an advantage to me. I also (and mostly) ran track though for the attainment of popularity by my peers, my dad, and recruiting college coaches for my other sports (volleyball and basketball). I participated in a variety of different events - the hurdles, 400 meter dash, 4x800, 4x400 and 4x100 relays, triple jump and discus (very short-lived). Aside from the discus throw, I wasn’t bad at track. In fact, I was pretty successful in the eyes of others. I won a state title with my 4x400 relay team and placed at state in most of my other events every year. When I look back at my track career though, I would never say that I was very successful at it. If I’m being honest with myself,  there were many times where I didn’t put my all into track because I didn’t love it. And because I didn’t go out and compete with heart and passion every single time, I failed myself more than I succeeded. Not because of what others might see when they look at the leaderboards and my perceived success, but because of what I see - which isn’t a whole lot of fight and courage. Don’t get me wrong, I look back at my track career now and I’m grateful for the opportunities it gave me and the lessons it taught me. Because of those lessons, I learned to value success in my eyes instead of others.

 So, if success isn’t all about the medals and trophies at the end of the finish line, then what really is it? To me, it’s being able to look at yourself at the end of the game and know that you gave it your all. Because in the end, if you gave it everything you had, in the right moments like you had trained for, then that’s simply all that you could give. At that point the outcome isn’t up to you.  

To me, success is being able to look at yourself at the end of the game and know that you gave it your all.

 When you get 4th place in a race, but still run your personal best - that is success. When you show up for your teammates and don’t take a play off throughout the whole game - that is success. Your willingness to compete and execute what you’ve been practicing, and showing up to do it in the moments that matter, is where you find success to be true.

Success is your internal process of: “Will I give my all today?” “Yes, I will”. Success comes from within and not from another person’s view of you or how many trophies you have on the wall.

Keep in mind that when don’t get that shiny gold medal or get to lift the trophy at the end of the journey, there will no doubt be critics who might believe you could have given more. Just don’t let that critic be you.